. . .these last nine months since he has been here have felt like those last few minutes of putting a puzzle together, when you’ve got about seven pieces left and you are just scrambling and excited with each last piece you click into place.
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Queer family with a family business: Velocitoddler. My blog takes the backseat to my unisex/gender neutral kids clothing line, but it’s important to write when words are congesting my spirit. My partner and I are raising our kids in a country with rapidly shifting gender dynamics. I am an actor, artist and seamster; she is a biomedical engineer.
A few months ago, I made the mistake of looking at some click-baity parenting site about what my kid was supposed to be doing at 3MO, as though reading this crap would somehow elevate my own life by me being able to translate my kid’s skills into my own parenting letter grade, and instead I felt outraged. MY KID SHOULD BE LAUGHING!?
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Here are five things you can do to encourage helpful, motivated behaviors from your own young humans:
When your kid asks a question, answer it! If you don’t know the answer, speculate with them. Don’t just let them be the ones asking “why,” ask them your own questions back.
Keeping a dialogue open with your kid on the most earnest and playful questions they have will lead to a willingness to tackle more difficult conversations later on.
Your kid feeling heard means your kid will let you know when they feel unheard or misunderstood.
Two-way communication isn’t important to every parent; it’s important to me, though, because I believe that saying, “because I said so,” as a response to a kid is insulting. It’s not helpful to only talk and not listen. Model that.